Can you hear me now?

I'm pretty pissed off right now. Why?

Well, because I don't want to look like a crazy, space-aged alien from now on out. Maybe that, or I'm just a little bitter (I'll get back to this). Although, David Beckham doesn't look so sci-fi and futuristic, so maybe I won't in 2035 when I, too, jump on the bluetooth bandwagon.


I'm not really sure why he showed up when I Googled "bluetooth headsets," but here Mr. Beckham is in all his facial glory. Maybe because he's too old to play soccer (decently) he reverts to smothering his face over all things American. Whatever, I'm not going to stop looking.

Anyways, after taking my GRE today -- I kind of feel bad for not ever caring/studying, but I still hit my 1100 range and am already accepted into a grad program, so who am I to have a conscience? -- I answered a phone call in the car and almost had a heart attack.

You know that feeling I'm talking about, when your chest literally caves in on itself and you have to take an extremely deep breath because you've been scared enough to almost wet yourself.

Oh, you don't know that feeling? Maybe it's just me then.

But anyways, beginning TOMORROW, July 1st, all motorists in California must refrain from answering their phones while driving on the road. This really pissed me off. It seemed so far away in 2006 when Arnold signed this into effect.

Well, I'm a little jealous about looking like a space-age freak, because my P.O.S. cell phone is broken and does not detect hands-free bluetooth devices. And I can't seem to find the headphones that originally came with it, and they can't be just any set of headphones because it's a USB charging cable.

So instead of shelling out money I don't have for a new phone -- which is silly since I think my contract is up for renewal in two to four months -- Monique's going ghetto style.

That's right, if anyone tries to call me while I'm behind the wheel, you're getting put on speaker.

Let the ridicule begin....

(I am also super excited about re-joining the workforce tomorrow! Wish me luck!!)

It's what's for dinner

I completely forgot about this recent development in meat marketing (ha, get it?)

Even more shocked that I never posted an entry about the new voice of BEEF when I came back from France. If you have no idea what I'm talking about and are slightly curious, check out this sound clip to hear the newest voice of beef advertising. It's both funny and slightly disturbing at the same time.

Recognize that unmistakable voice?

No? Need a hint?

...........

........

.....

...

..

.



(You know you've made it big when BEEF asks you to be its official spokesperson.)

Might want to think about what you put in your mouth from here on out...

The price is WRONG, bitch!

Hopefully you all remember that line out of Happy Gilmore and I don't sound like a complete ass right now. But I'm banking off your movie knowledge more than my social(-ly acceptable) skills, so I think I'm good, for now.

Anyways, being in France kind of deprived me from American television. Well, not really, since I could watch Friends, Fresh Prince and 90210 dubbed in terrible French whenever I wanted. So let me edit myself and say that I was deprived from current American television. Then again, back here in the U.S. we sort of took a page out of France's socialist mindset and embarked upon months of useless writers' strikes. My mom's conspiracy theory is that the strikes kept building up until the climax and subsequent abrupt termination of the strikes focused all of the media's attention on the 2008 Academy Awards. In short, the strikes were all a sick, prolonged way of promoting the show.

Believe what you want, but when I came back in April I was able to reconnect with my favorite show -- Grey's Anatomy -- in time to see the remaining episodes of the season as well as the season (perhaps series? doubt it....) finale.

But I haven't been watching much more beyond the occasional sports broadcast. (I saw Tiger's dramatic come-from-behind U.S. Open playoff on the final day, as well as the Lakers' EMBARRASSMENT in Boston, slamming the door on the 2008 NBA season. Honestly, that was the least fundamentally-sound basketball game I've ever seen in my life, and I've sat through J.V. and freshman high school games.)

Until today. After organizing many drawers and cabinets throughout my new house, I needed a relaxing television break.

And completely forgot that Drew Carey is the new host of The Price is Right! While he is the same bumbling personality that he was in Whose Line, I'm interested to see if he's going to take on any of Bob Barker's crankiness. Though, that may have been due to his age. So maybe Carey will pick some of that up if he stays on for 50+ years.....

The girls' half of our freshman hall who came out to see a screening of The Price is Right in Los Angeles, posing as the infamous "Barkers' Beauties." Because we had at least 25 people in our group, one of the residents from our hall made it on t.v., while the rest of us has to sit through Bob's crankiness and rude shots at guests during the commercial breaks. It was awesome!

Also, I saw an ad for a new series running this fall called The Ex List. So that pretty much means that the Eva character is no longer going to appear on Grey's Anatomy, because the actress is going to be the main character in this new show. At the end of last season, Eva's character took a total nose dive and I will happily say, "Good riddance" to that storyline.

Oh yeah, and as you can tell: I spent some time last night tweaking with my blog and this is how I think it's going to look from now on out.

...Or until I get bored with it next year.

We don't need no water...

Wait, yes we do.

I can officially report that from both sides of the mountain range in Northern California -- coastal and inland -- are being heavily affected by the 800 rampant wildfires spreading through our half of the state. Typically around this time of year I was always moving out of my dorm/apartments at UCSB and inhaling thick smoke from as far south as San Diego County. So June is always associated with SoCal fires in my head.


Fittingly enough, since today was my big move-out-of-my-parents'-house day, the skyline was covered with a thick, brownish haze. Not only could I barely see Mt. Diablo from the living room -- a feature that sold the house, because we literally are at the base of the mountain -- but just looking at the ground, my world had taken on a reddish hue. I can't imagine what the sun must have even looked like under its smoky guise.

Point of my story is this: everyone I've been talking to lately feels like they've been heavy smokers for the past few days. And it's no different no matter where you go, we're all being hit pretty hard. Well, I guess I can be thankful for the fact that this is all I have to deal with, other than, you know, having my house burn down or close friends and family die in the flames.

And on to another, unrelated topic, I'm having a hard time blogging under the name "French State of Mind." In theory, yes, it's always going to be in the back of my mind, especially how all of my dad's family comes from Francophone regions. But I feel like more of my life these days is spent rambling about coping with California and re-establishing a new life here.

That being said, I'm thinking that I'm due for a big revamp soon. If I can figure it out. Plus, I am ADD girl and my blog has looked like this for nearly one year now.

According to Lisa, I'm a "sea goddess"

Here's the hairstyle I think I've finally come up with for when I'm a bridesmaid in Meghan's wedding in a little over a month!


Hopefully my hair will work with this style because it a.) never does what I want it to and b.) is in different lengths and layers. I'm not sure what the front will look like, but the back part is really cute! And does anyone else picture Katherine Heigl being the face on the other side of this 'do?! Or is that just me...?

In other news, TOMORROW is my big moving day! Stockton, here I come. I'm almost done packing everything I need up for this week, but will be back here for the weekend to take my GRE. Then beginning July 1, I will be working and living just a little east of here.

Oh and did I mention, ON MY OWN AGAIN?!

Another exciting event coming up is the 4th of July! This will be one of the few times I'm actually celebrating the holiday in the United States, so that's always a big deal when people actually care that July 4th means something. And for the second time in five years, I'll be celebrating it in Santa Barbara. So that's my one big road trip coming up. Hopefully I'll get in a few more in the near future...

The next time I write to you will be from my new house!

Happy Summer!

As excited as I am to be moving, I absolutely hate packing. Well, luckily I'm doing this in waves. So in order to put off packing one dresser full of clothes and the bare minimum of my toiletries, I give you my pictures from the first day of summer with my mom.

...When it rained in Monterey Bay and Pebble Beach. It was 105 degrees and dry as hell in Alamo, but 70, muggy and stormy on the coast. I'm kind of bummed we didn't make it out to Cannery Row or the Bubba Gump Shrimp Shack -- two places I haven't been in many a year. Oh well, there'll be more chances.


Enjoy the new season, kiddies (regardless of your weather)! This is definitely my favorite part of the year :)

Three to go!

Big news all around today. I finally met with some (NORMAL!!!) people and found myself a place to live over the next year. Which means, Tuesday I'm moving to the Central Valley.

I also found out the sports I'll be responsible for at Pacific (beginning July 1st). Here are a few hints:



ANNNND.......

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yay, Health!

Alright, now that I'm no longer on the French government's dime (and technically no longer considered a dependent of my parents), I'm back on my own health coverage.

That means that yesterday I finally had my appointment at Kaiser in Walnut Creek. I've always had a PPO, so this was the first time I got to view the inner-workings of a very, very large HMO hospital. And let me tell you, the fact that I was able to figure out some of this crap in French astounds me.

Though many people are skeptical of Kaiser for its long-term negligence with terminal and elderly patients, I'm really pleased with my minor dealings with them thus far. Heck, on my plan vaccinations are free, visits are about $20, and I think x-rays are free too.

Furthermore, after being accepted to Kaiser, I was able to scroll through eight pages of doctors to find someone of my gender, who shares similar interests, is closer to my age range than my parents' and a doctor who is familiar with issues I have in my family (i.e., cardiac concerns). I picked my doctor and then met with her yesterday.

Not only did she give me a (VERY CHEAP) refill on my current prescription, but she also administered blood tests to check up on my heart vitals and sent me out to a nutritionist so we could help curb my triglycerides and cholesterol -- which have been historically high in my family.

After wandering the maze that is this hospital, I found the laboratory in the basement where I proceeded to draw a number and wait in line until it was called. Upon being called, all I had to do was show photo ID, my member card and voilà, instant blood-drawing. Much, much easier than anything I had to do in France and I didn't even need to bring a book with me, because the lines weren't very long at all!

When it was all said and done, I paid around $60 for a new prescription, doctor's visit, and eight lab blood tests.

But the best part is when I checked my personal Kaiser web profile last night, my blood test results came back only about six hours after the test! AND EVEN THOUGH I GAINED A BILLION POUNDS WHILE LIVING IN FRANCE, MY CHOLESTEROL IS ON THE LOWER END OF THE SPECTRUM!!!

Wow, I'm not excited about that or anything.

So for now -- I'm shocked to say this -- it's American (dental/health) bureaucracy 1, French (dental/health) bureaucracy -3. I figured it wouldn't be too long before we got something right in comparison to European societies.

Now if only Kaiser dealt with major issues this thoroughly...

Little Sister's Graduation Pictures!

The Social Sciences ceremony in the College of Letters & Science. That's my old dorm in the back across the Lagoon!


Dad, Aimee and me on Aimee's balcony for the last time

Danger.

Bike trail from Goleta to Montecito

Me on my bike near our house downtown.

End of our 10-mile bike ride!

Leaving college and coming back isn't that great of an idea

After hanging out at my little sister's graduation from UC Santa Barbara and spending a lot of time with all my old dorm friends, I definitely miss Santa Barbara.

Logically, this is going to be a really easy transition:

Going from living on the beach in Southern California with tons of friends from the past five years, to moving to Stockton in the Central Valley at a very small school, where I have one really good friend from high school.

So maybe I should change my title to: "From the Americain to the French Riviera, to the Middle of Nowhere." Catchy, isn't it?

Monique's going to have a lot of growing to do in the next few months. At least the job I'm taking sounds like it's going to be heck of exciting! And I have Meghan, so I won't be totally alone ;)

I knew it was a good choice at some point

So I know there are a whole lot of Bush-bashers out there, and I, at times am indeed among those of you.

However, I'm still not going to deny the fact that I helped vote him into office back in 2004. At the time I thought it was a good decision and after months and years of no longer holding to that opinion, yesterday changed my mind in the blink of an eye.

George W. Bush has given me, personally a $300 check. Never mind that it's a federal economy stimulus check and many families earned twice that amount.

But, would Al Gore have done the same for me?! I don't think so. His silly movie/book would have never came out had he been sworn in and too busy with presidential matters and consequently would not have the Nobel prize to his name either (don't get me started on the fact that those people actually RESEARCHING global warming as well as the producers and/or the cameramen should be the ones garnering awards, not the big celebrity who filled in as a voice-over). So, Al Gore should be happy we had all those issues with hanging and pregnant chads, otherwise he'd be just another boring president.

And he wouldn't have given me a check, because he (most likely, though I have my doubts after 9/11) wouldn't be bombing the shit out of the Middle East thus causing our prices of oil and overall living to skyrocket on account of the American people really just not trusting the president and his current "executive" decisions. Though, in W's defense, Congress and everyone still had to allow his decisions, it's not like it's just Bush that's supporting all of this.

So that's my story. Thank you Mr. President for ruining the economy and then giving us all $300 to $600. I'm sure we won't be in debt or economic panic anymore now that your deus-ex-machina has saved us all...

(But hey, I'm not one to complain about free money! Neither is my currently unemployed bank account.)

It's finally over

Although I abandoned ship a little early on my nine-month contract in the Academie de Nice, today would have officially been my last day working.

My sister graduates this weekend from Santa Barbara and I had the o.k. way back in February to finish my contract two and a half weeks early and I even booked a ticket to fly out on Wednesday, June 11.

Wow, the time has flown REALLY quickly not teaching and being in the United States (doing important things like getting a job and searching for a house). I don't think I could have sanely made it over the past month with that crazed roommate I had! I know had I stayed, I would have been on the hunt for a new place ASAP.

But you know what, I kind of want to be there still. There's the catch. However, I promised myself not to set foot in the same place twice anymore -- if I can help it. There's the whole rest of the world I want to see next! Well, first there's some money to be made, and then when I have vacation time, I'd like to get my feelers out there.

And I take the BLONDE award for the day....

I swear, I've been to Sacramento a MILLION times before. My extended family lives up in that area as well as some friends who I've already visited before!

So that doesn't really excuse my actions today.

Well, there was a good deal of traffic from Vacaville on down towards my home stretch of freeway, and I kind of got caught up in a daze by the monotony of having to stay seated in my car without actually going anywhere. (Loud music and a sunroof also don't bode well for my attention span). But I guess somehow I missed the offramp from 80 to 680 -- something I've taken a million times.

Anyways, I kind of figured it out when I crossed the Crockett Bridge instead of the Benicia Bridge -- it looked a little older and different than what I thought it looked like yesterday. Then I realized landmarks weren't making any sense to me at all, and when I saw the sign that said "Richmond," that really clinched my assumption that I was, in fact, lost.

But then my mind conjured up a conversation I had quite a few years past with another friend from the Bay Area. Although I've noticed it before, her verbalizing this fact made me really clear of its accuracy: "There are a whole bunch of intertwining freeways in the Bay Area." So then I started looking for upcoming freeway signs and realized that I was getting closer to Berkeley and Oakland! Score, being an avid A's fan, I can certainly tell you that I know at least three different ways to Oakland from my house. Long story short, I finally found my way out of there -- I took 80 to 580 to 24 then finally met up with 680 -- and it took me 16 miles longer than necessary had I originally turned off 680 from 80 in Fairfield. (See below for those of you who need a visual, the red circle indicates my missed turnoff, while the arrow denotes the freeway I eventually caught up with.)


Well, at least I got to experience the scenic Bay route....

Pays to live in CA

Why am I awake at this absurd hour of the day?

Because a 3.0 earthquake shook the house so hard that everyone popped out of bed just now.

I know you're thinking a 3.0 isn't very big and all, but that's where you're wrong. My dad guessed it was about a 4.0 depending on where it was centered. In fact the magnitude felt so strong because it was centered in our hometown. Don't believe me? Read it here.


No matter how frequently these guys happen, I still get scared of the prophesied "big one."

Edit: Just as I clicked "send" we were dealt another, larger 3.5 quake centered 1 km farther than the last. This girl's going to have trouble sleeping tonight.

It's official!

After today, I am officially an employee at Pacific.

I filled out my W4 and other employment forms, went to a full day Athletics Dept. retreat, and I may have finally found a place to live!

Get excited for me (I sure am) because I'm starting in a little over three weeks!!

That's what friends are for

Wow, I definitely didn't see this coming:

Last week, when I was in Santa Barbara, a few friends invited my sister and I out to a restaurant/bar down town to grab some food during happy hour and watch the Lakers game.

One margarita into the night, I made a quick comment in passing that our waiter was kind of attractive. And -- come on he's a waiter and clearly makes a living off tips -- he started getting friendlier as the night went on. Which could have very easily been confused with flirtier.

Anyways, my smart little sis decided to mess with me when the tab came to us. On the receipt, she wrote:

"You're hot. Call me. -Monique (phone number)."

At this point, I'm extremely embarrassed and tore off the top section that said "you're hot." So now he only has a mini half-ripped paper that says "Call me," with my number attached.

As he goes to pick up his tips, the waiter starts reading over "my" little note closely, at this point everyone but myself goes inside and starts yelling in his general direction, "Come here Monique. Monique!" to make it relatively obvious that the only other girl in our party wasn't Monique.

Now I'm beet read and standing at the street corner, waiting to cross and close this chapter of my life. Because I don't do very well in flirting situations like this. I'm never the one to give out my number or make a first advance! ...Which explains why I've only dated two people here.

Anyways, fast forward one week. I still haven't heard anything and wasn't ever expecting to, really.

But today....... that all changed.

I received this "mysterious" text from an 805 area code (Santa Barbara area) that read: "Hey, it's Bobby from (restaurant name). Wanna grab a drink sometime?"

Goodness, NO! I deleted the text in complete horror. He actually had the balls to call me, well sort of call me. And anyways, SB is over 4 hours by car from here, so that drink's gonna have to wait. And I don't even want to go through with this, because I'm too embarrassed any of it ever happened!!!

:-\

What the F?

I have no idea what's going on right now.

(Well, this blanket statement applies to pretty much most of my life, but I'll zone in here and be specific with y'all.)

For some reason I cannot hold down anything. Whenever I eat I just feel disgustingly sick. And I don't think I've ever had this sensation before. My mouth is watering and I'm insanely hungry, but my stomach isn't having any of it. Not even Squirt, citrus soda! :(

Well, at least since it's now June 1st and I've been approved for Kaiser's health insurance, I can try to make an appointment to see a doctor. Though, since being denied from my PPO, I am not sure who my doctor will be, but, hopefully I'll be able to see one....

This is all TMJ's fault! If I never had that, I wouldn't be considered a "high risk" patient and I'd be back on the same Blue Shield plan I had before I left France. However, come August I'm going to return to full-time student status, thus will most likely be able to mooch off UOP's student coverage.

And no, I take it back. It's my dad's fault for being a contractor. Haha, if he was employed through a company, I could still leech off the family's health coverage.

Oh well. Until then, I'll just keep dreaming of sandwiches and mint-chocolate ice cream (among other dairy products). Bread and crackers are getting old....